Grief: The Definition

Simply defined, grief is the normal and natural reaction to significant emotional loss of any kind. While we never compare losses, any list would include death and divorce as obvious painful losses. Our list also includes many others; retirement, moving, pet loss, financial and health issues, etc.

The range of emotions associated with grief is as varied as there are people and personalities. There is no list of feelings that would adequately describe one persons emotions, much less and entire society.

Grief is individual and unique. As every relationship is unique, so are the feelings and thoughts each person will have about the relationship that has been altered by death, divorce or for other reasons.

The Problem

While grief is normal and natural, most of the information passed on within our society about dealing with grief is not normal, natural, or helpful. Grief is the emotional response to loss, but most of the information we have learned about dealing with loss is intellectual.

The majority of incorrect ideas about dealing with loss can be summed up in six myths which are so common that nearly everyone recognizes them. Most people have never questioned whether or not they are valid. The misinformation is best describes in the following.

Six Myths

Time Heals All Wounds

Grieve Alone

Be Strong

Don’t Feel Bad

Replace the Loss

Keep Busy

Just looking at the myth time heals creates the idea that a person just has to wait and they will feel better. We have known people who waited 10, 20, 30 and 40 years and still don’t feel better. We also know that they would tell you that not only had time not healed them, but that it had compounded the pain. The other five myths carry equally unhelpful messages.

The Solution

Recovery from loss is accomplished by discovering and completing all of the undelivered communications that accrue in relationships. We are all advised to “Let Go” and “Move On” after losses of all kinds. Most of us would do that if we knew how.

Completion of pain caused by loss is what allows us to let go and move on. It is almost impossible to move on without first taking a series of actions that lead to completion.

Before taking the actions to complete, it is important to look at and often dismiss some of the ideas or myths that we tried to use with loss and have not been working.

Safety and Correct Actions

The Grief Recovery Method®: Grief Support Group provides the correct action choices that help people move beyond the pain caused by loss. It is an eight week program that creates a safe environment in which to look at old beliefs about dealing with loss; to look as what losses have affected your life; and to take new actions which lead to completion of the pain attached to one of those losses.  

The Grief Recovery Handbook—The Action Program for Moving Beyond Death, Divorce, and Other Losses, including Health, Career & Faith (released by HarperCollins in 2009), by John W. James and Russell Friedman, founders of The Grief Recovery Institute® are used as texts for the Grief Recovery Programs.

Commitment and Attendance

The Grief Recovery Method®: Grief Support Group is not an occasional, drop-in-group.

For the safety and success of all participants, commitment and attendance are essential The fee for the program is:$125.00 per group member which includes the Grief Recovery Handbook that is yours to keep.

The Grief Recovery Method®: Grief Support Group is lead by Darlyn Hunt who has been trained and certified by The Grief Recovery Institute®. To ensure your success with in this program, your facilitator has direct access to the founders of the Institute.